Oh wondrous scar, bumpy and red and ugly, how you have ruined bikini season for me!
And yet therein lies an escape: I shall always have an excuse to cover up.
Oh, makers of cards and floral bouquets! How my friends have supported your bottom lines in this past fortnight! My shelves are laden with colors and comments, wishes and prayers, sentiments heartfelt and appreciated.
Oh occupational therapists and your kind! How clever you are, inventing the grabber and the walker and the cane, and that most marvelous of inventions, the sock puller-upper! But how dastardly are those white compression socks on the unshaved leg. Begone, constrictor! Your blood clot prevention work is done!
Oh church ladies and the moms! How generous you are with your offers of food and rides! Our freezer shelves overfloweth with your goodness and mercy and soup!
Oh mother and mother-in-law! How dear are your phone calls and voicemails! I am FINE! I know how deeply you both longed to be here, yet duties at your own homes beckoned.
Oh friend Alison! What would we have done without you? Your example of how to sleep well is a lesson we needed. Your meals, and the notebook of recipes you left behind, have sated us body and soul. You have achieved the Mary Poppins Pinnacle of Care award, and we are still trying to devise a plot to kidnap you in perpetuity.
Oh spouse and child! How patient you are! How well you clear the floors of tripping hazards and allow my drug-addled brain to be more random than usual!
Oh new hip! May I and thou bond now and forever.